Can You Be “Gay” and A Faithful Christian?

You may face the crisis of a daughter who is questioning her sexual identity. Although my work is focused on helping girls, I am offering a couple of messages from Charlie Bird’s book, Behind the Mask. Charlie offers a path for other Christian/Latter-day Saint youth so they “don’t have to hate themselves to love their Church, or hate their Church to love themselves” (p. 162). This book clearly supports the blessings of living a chaste life, something which is vitally important to well-being. Charlie warns that without compassionate spiritual support, individuals with same-sex attraction can be led into dark sexual outlets and exploitation (p. 51). Children who experience same-sex attraction need our help to know that their most important identity is not being “gay,” but their identity as a beloved son or daughter of God.

Current social norms and “scientific” research say that same sex attraction is inborn and unchangeable. Credible science tells us that being “gay” is not a “one-size-fits-all” issue that can be reduced to simplified stereotypes. Youth and parents need to know that same-sex attraction can be “fluid,” meaning, not permanent. There is a movement of X-Gay individuals whose stories need to be amplified. Individuals who have unwanted same sex attraction stemming from child sexual abuse need healing from trauma, not a further erosion of their well-being from sexual experimentation. Our loved ones who experience same-sex attraction need to know that they have more options for their lives than the “gay” stereotypes represented on social media.

I came away from this book with a deep love for Charlie and validation for the spiritual wrestling that is part of every disciple’s life, especially in today’s culture. I came away with more understanding and love for my own loved ones who struggle with same-sex attraction and a strong desire to combat the myths of the “gay” culture.